BALANCING IS REALLY A MYTH!

You just need to do it one at a time.

“There’s a difference between breaking yourself into different parts of your life and struggling to balance them simultaneously AND showing up as a whole person in each different part of your life”.

These were the words of Jescil Richard, my Community manager at The Cave, during a call on Wednesday.

Oops, I didn't even say Hi, or make the usual ‘Dear Ahavite’ greetings. I'm just so eager to share with you the details of the call with you, do forgive my manners🥹.

It's Friday, the end of a working week, and I trust that the week has been a great one for you. The target and goals you set for the week, were you able to meet up with them? Whether or not you did, I'd love to hear about it in your replies.

Going back to my first statement in this letter, yeah scroll back up to read it🌚, I had a call with Jescil on Wednesday. I had earlier complained to her about being confused about my life. She called me and we spoke and so far, it has been the best call I had this week.

There are different aspects to the name SHOWERS; which includes being a Telecoms Expert, Graphic Designer and a Counselor. Let me also add community building, where The Ahava Community stem out from.

In all honesty, balancing each part hasn't been a child's play. I've had to struggle to maintain each part of me, without one feeling left out for the other, and nahhh it wasn't working.

During the call, Jescil explained that I was struggling because I had unconsciously shared myself, giving Showers as a Telecoms Expert different from Showers as a Designer, which is also different from Showers as a Counselor, or Showers as a student.

In her words, “You are SHOWERS, which is just one person and you should show up as a WHOLE PERSON even in the different aspects of your life. It is okay that you do all of the things you've mentioned, but it will only make sense if you devote ALL of you into these different areas, taking one per time”.

And it all made sense!!!

I just need to devote all of myself to anything I'm doing at a particular time, so I can get the best results, which would make me fulfilled in the end.

Precious had earlier said in her reply to Monday's letter that, ‘Sometimes, we need breaks from certain areas of our life to focus on another.’

This statement buttress Jescil’s point that I need not rush everything together as that would only make me more confused. I just have to do one thing per time, knowing fully well that once I'm done I can go on to the next.

This way I won't beat myself up for one part slacking off for the other. Because in the end, I'd be able to attend to one or two, if not all aspects, and feel fulfilled for a job well done.

I can also put a part on hold, giving attention to the one of utmost urgency, after which I can continue from where I stopped.

That was all I needed to hear to help clear off my confusion and I just had to share it with you. I had read through the replies of the previous letter and one or two persons talked about being confused with their lives as well.

If you're into different things like me, struggling with balancing, or you're just confused on what to do with YOU; trying to figure out what you want for yourself, I have just one answer for You;

Find your IKIGAI; Connect to your WHY!

IKIGAI means having a purpose; knowing your reason for being, finding your WHY. It is when you know why you exist that you get clarity on the things you should do and not do, hence clearing your confusion.

Connecting to your WHY gives you a clear picture of WHO YOU ARE, WHAT YOU CAN DO & WHAT YOU SHOULD PURSUE. Having this at hand is like a key to a treasure of gold which you're now able to access.

And even when everything falls apart, your WHY keeps you going.

Just because the people you look up to show that they're good at balancing their lives, doesn't mean you should beat up yourself for not being able to do the same. Truth is, they're doing one thing at a time, at the shortest of time, which makes it look like they're balancing it.

Balancing is really a myth, you just have to show up as a whole, in one part, at a time.

This isn't to put down people who are blessed with the skill of multitasking. If you can combine things well and get maximum results, good for you. But if you're struggling and always getting confused, don't compare yourself to them, and do your things one after the other.

Till I write to you again, think on these things. And if you have questions for me, do well to send me a message via WhatsApp.

I can't wait to read your amazing replies and I look forward to them💙.

Don't forget to enjoy the weekend, doing that which you love the most🫂.

See you in the coming week💙.

Lots of Love,

SHOWERS || Queen Ahava💙